Want to develop your marriage with godly goals? The following article provides you with some specialized areas of concentration that may be helpful for you as you seek to
1. Speak Only Positive and Good Things About Each Other!
Words are very powerful and have meaning. Studies of couple who continued to speak positive and uplifting words to one another had meaningful marriages. If you want the other person to love and take care of you for a lifetime, invest in speaking good things about one another. Compare your relationship to a bank account. The more positive deposits you make, the more valuable your account.
2. Don’t Hold Grudges!
There will be disagreements. Forgive easily and to work on issues. One of the marvelous things about relationships is that we are all different. A difference of opinion does not mean a couple is not compatible. It just means that we all have different opinions. We all have different ways to accomplish the same thing or there are times when the other person has a better idea.
3. Pray For One Another Every Day!
Marriage is a sacred institution and involves a spiritual battle. There are forces of evil seeking to break it apart or cause friction within it. Therefore, we must dedicate ourselves to praying with and for our mates as much as possible. Set time apart each day to pray for your spouse's needs, protection, and advancement. Pray that the Lord would show you how to better serve your spouse and be useful for advancing their happiness.
4. Buy Things For One Another!
One of the biggest complaints of marriage is when a person stops doing nice things as they did when they were dating. Just because we are now married does not mean for us to stop sending cards, small gifts, flowers, going out on a date, and taking a special time to tell each other you love each other. Things don’t have to be expensive, but it is the thought that counts. Remember to invest in your relationship!
5. Worship Together!
Marriage is difficult enough without maintaining a commitment to worship (weekly and daily). There are too many distractions and influences that will hinder a relationship without God. Remember your wedding vows, “What God has joined together.” Being close to God allows a couple to seek wisdom and guidance in their relationship. It also provides a willingness to allow forgiveness to play an important part of your marriage.
6. Touch, Spend Special Time Alone!
There is something special about touching! One thing is that is shows the importance of each other. Touch never solves disagreements, but it does give validation to the fact that you care for the other person. So be sure to give hugs, put your arm around your spouse, or give a simple yet loving touch on the shoulder. Affirm your spouse and spread your affection through small, daily contacts.
7. Don’t Let Arguments or Disagreements Get Out Of Hand
Disagreements in every relationship will happen, even in the best of marriages. Either of you can call a “time out” to set a time to discuss disagreements or you may agree to disagree for that moment.
Remember when disagreements arise, it is always best to try to limit your anger and communicate to each other in positive ways. Never name call or place negative put-downs to one another. Do not use humor to make the other person look stupid. Successful marriages have learned the importance of loving one another without using negative influences or trying to get one’s way. These will only destroy a relationship. Once you fully understand this as a couple, you are on your way to having a more successful and productive relationship.
8. Express Your Gratitude!
Don't take your spouse for granted. Did she get the kids dressed? This was a monumental thing. Sure it has happened a thousand times, but it is no less significant each time. Make sure she knows that you appreciate it.
Did your husband make any kind of headway on your "honey-do" list? Leave a little note of gratitude for him. Your spouse needs your affirmation and regular praise. In this "home church" we should regularly build one another up and fulfill the Lord's command to be thankful (Col. 3:15).
[The above article was adapted from pastoralcareinc.com]