It is providential that this is the passage that we have before us this morning. Today begins the season of advent—that time of anticipation leading up to Christmas; the time when we focus our attention on the coming of Christ. One of the songs that the church sings during this time is the song “God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman.”
Those of you who are familiar with the carol know that the chorus of that song repeats the grand blessing of Christmas: Comfort and Joy. “Oh tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy, oh tidings of comfort and joy.”
Those of you who are familiar with the carol know that the chorus of that song repeats the grand blessing of Christmas: Comfort and Joy. “Oh tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy, oh tidings of comfort and joy.”
But you may also have noticed that another word was used repeatedly. A word that seems to be just the opposite of comfort and joy. It is the word grief (or regret, or sorrow). That word is used 10-11 times (depending on which version you use). And that grief or sorrow is coupled with the word repentance, which it signifies.
So you have comfort and joy, and yet you have great sorrow all mixed together. It is a cauldron of emotions being all mixed together here.
And I wonder if Paul is trying to do something. I wonder if Paul’s Hebrew roots are seeping forth here. For there is an interesting thing in the OT language. The Hebrew word nacham is a word that has basically three meanings. It can mean comfort, regret, or repent.
In the life of God’s people sorrow and comfort/joy are not necessarily extreme opposites. They are next door neighbors. They may even be said to live in the same house—they are that much intertwined. I don’t know if I want to make too much of this, but this word play is interesting.
If I could draw this: Comfort and sorrow go together. Godly sorrow is a means to true comfort. Or maybe I can say that if you really want comfort in life—it will not be found in anything temporal, like a nice sofa or a higher tax bracket. Certainly such things can make you more comfortable, but true comfort—the kind that puts your heart at ease, that is something that can only be experience of godly sorrow—the kind that accompanies repentance.
The comforting grace of real repentance.
I. Its starting point [8]
Look at verse 8 with me. I want you to see where this comfort and repentance really begins. I want you to notice that it most often commences with painful words.
Notice what Paul says in verse 8, “For even if I made you grieve with my letter, I do not regret it—though I did regret it, for I see that that letter grieved you, though only for a while.”
Paul acknowledges what every person who has ever had to bear bad news has ever experienced. The words he spoke were painful—to the Corinthians and to himself. Paul says, “I know these words hurt you. And it hurt me to have to write them. I regretted doing it.” The word there is the word sorrow. It grieved him. It pained him to have to address them and be the bearer of the admonition.
Let’s face it. It isn’t easy having to speak to people about their sins. Who really likes confrontation? Nobody! But it has to happen. If the sinner is going to repent and come into this state of comfort, they have to hear it.
And Paul says though he did regret it—though he was grieved, he ended up not regretting it. In other words, his addressing them about their deviance made him feel better. There was comfort in executing his conscience. He got this off his chest and felt good about having done what he was supposed to do.
All of this is a reminder that each of us is not only called to repentance, but an integral part of the process of repentance. The repentance of our kids and grand-kids, it really depends on us. The church’s fidelity rests very much on the elder’s of this church doing their duty as shepherds.
This is why preaching can be one of the most difficult things to do. This is why so many preachers today are not doing it right. It is because preaching is bringing to people’s attention the fact that God forbids certain things and requires them to live a certain way.
Again, we like to avoid this. It is awkward. It is hard. I once was working with a young lady when I worked downtown and we got to talking. She started talking about her boyfriend and we chatted a while about their relationship. And there came a point where I had to speak to her about how it was wrong for them to be living together. Let me tell you, there is nothing easy about having a conversation with a co-worker about what goes on in their bedroom. And she looked at me and said, “That conversation got awkward.” I told her that it is my job to have awkward conversations.
I don’t know what ever came of that relationship. I don’t know if the couple ever ended up repenting or not. There were some sorrowful sentiments, but I don’t know if there was true repentance. Which is the next point that our text makes. But again, it is important to see that, in most cases, it all begins with a difficult conversation. People need to be confronted with the demands of God’s law and understand that God requires that they obey Him. If we avoid it we are doing people a great disservice because it means they are not going to get right with God and experience the true comfort that only His pardon can afford.
And that brings us then to the next point. One of the things that Paul brings out in this passage is the true definition of repentance. We see that repentance begins with a hard conversation, but wherein does it consist.
This passage is great because it shows us what true repentance looks like and it distinguishes it from false repentance.
II. Its definition
But here in this passage we see it described as three things: a true sorrow for sin, a hatred of it, and a change of lifestyle.
A. Repentance involves sorrow for sin
You’ll notice that the word grief or sorrow (depending on which version you are using) appears a number of times in this passage. The word is lupe and it carries the idea of deep sadness. It is not just the recognition that you have done something wrong. Many people know that they violate God's commands and have no feeling of regret. Many people even joke about such things and have no glint of sorrow.
Those who are truly repentant have heavy hearts. They feel the sting of conviction because they realize they have disobeyed God's command and have offended him.
But you'll notice that repentance is not merely being sad. It is important to recognize that true repentance also involves hatred for sin.
B. Repentance involves hatred for sin
Look at verse 7. Notice the word that is used there. It is a little stronger. My version translates it as "mourning." It is the Greek word hordurmos. It has the sense of being greatly distressed to the point of verbal cries—wailing. It is the idea excessive grieving or being utterly maddened by what has happened.
One of the old Greek poets had a book wherein he had 4 women walking in a line. It was something of a parade of grief. The first woman was named Lupe, and she had her head bowed upon her breast. Behind her were two women Odunee and Hordurmos. Odunee was seen tearing her hair and Hordurmos was described as a revolting, emaciated figure. She is presented as utterly disgusting- a picture of the disgust that fills one's soul. The last woman in tow was Despondancy—she represented utter despair.
Now notice that there is not utter despair here in Paul’s language. Paul talks about how their greif was only for a time. In other words, they recovered and found new joy again once their repentance took affect.
But we should note that they were really and truly cut up. They came to be really convicted about their misdeeds.
Finally, you'll notice that repentance culminates in a change of life.
C. Repentance involves a change in lifestyle
It wasn’t just grief, but (as verse 10 says) it was a grief that lead to repentance. The word repentance means change of mind. It signifies that there was a definite reversing, not just of one’s attitude and affection, but of one’s whole course of action.
And this is why Paul says that their repentance was a godly grief—one that leads to salvation; and not a worldly grief which produces death. Godly grief is the full flower of repentance, whereas worldly grief stops short and does not blossom into the real change that God demands.
Now I want to pause here and flesh this difference out a little more. I find that Thomas Watson dissects this very well and helps us to gain a sense of how true repentance is defined—how it differs from false repentance.
[1] Natural softness and tenderness of spirit. Some have a tender affection, arising from their constitution, whereby they are apt to weep and relent when they see any object of pity. These are not repenting tears: for many weep to see another's misery, who cannot weep at their own sin.
Tender conscience. Sensitive to wrongdoing.
[2] Legal terrors. A man who has lived in a course of sin, at last is made sensible; he sees hell ready to devour him, and is filled with anguish and horror; but after a while the tempest of conscience is blown over, and he is quiet. He then concludes he is a true penitent, because he has felt some bitterness in sin, but this is not repentance. Judas had some trouble of mind. If anguish and trouble were sufficient for repentance, then the damned would be most penitent, for they are most in anguish of mind. There may be trouble of mind where there is no grieving for the offence against God.
[3] A slight superficial sorrow. When God's hand lies heavy upon a man, as when he is sick or lame, he may vent a sigh or tear, and say, 'Lord, have mercy;' yet this is not true repentance. Ahab did more than all this. 'He rent his clothes, and fasted, and lay in sackcloth, and went softly.' I Kings 21:27. His clothes were rent, but not his heart. The eye may be watery, and the heart flinty. An apricot may be soft without, but it has a hard stone within.
[4] God motions rising in the heart. Every good motion is not repentance. Some think if they have motions in their hearts to break off their sins, and become religious, it is repentance. As the devil may stir up bad motions in the godly, so the Spirit of God may stir up good motions in the wicked. Herod had many good thoughts and inclinations stirred up in him by John Baptist's preaching, yet he did not truly repent, for he still lived in incest.
[5] Vows and resolutions. What vows and solemn protestations do some make in their sickness, that if God should recover them they will be new men, but afterwards they are as bad as ever! 'Thou saidst, I will not transgress;' here was a resolution: but for all this, she ran after her idols. 'Under every green tree thou wanderest, playing the harlot.' Jer 2:20.
[6] Leaving off some gross sin. (1) A man may leave off some sins, and keep others. Herod reformed many things that were amiss, but kept his Herodias. (2) An old sin may be left to entertain a new one. A man may leave off riot and prodigality, and turn covetous; which is merely to exchange one sin for another.
Why do I take the time to go thorugh all this? It is so that you can determine whether or not you have truly repented. It very well may be that you need to repent of your repentance. You might have thought that you have done what God requires—you may have thought that you have repented, but it has only a superficial form of repentance. It has been a worldly repentance, which is only a bad replica of what is truly required.
God requires that you not just feel bad, but that you cease from your sin. That you turn from it and begin to endeavor to live for God.
The true definition of repentance consists of regret and reformation. Anything less than that is deficient in God’s eyes.
What are the fruits of repentance? We’ve talked about where comfort and repentance starts. We’ve seen what it consists of. Let’s talk about where it ends.
III. Its evidences
I want you to notice that a God honoring repentance produces at least three things. The first is perhaps the most important. It is salvation.
A. Salvation
Verse 10 tells us that godly grief produces repentance that leads to salvation, whereas worldly grief leads only to death.
If there is one thing that this passage should impress upon us it is that eternal life is in the balance. There must be a break with sin. You cannot indulge the flesh and remain in the same sinful patterns and receive eternal life.
This does not mean perfection, to be sure. But there is a break with the lifestyle—a definite turning away that occurs and an endeavoring to live as God requires.
What Paul says here is what Christ himself said, “Without repentance there is no forgiveness of sin.”
If you want to receive God’s pardon, then you must turn to God.
Closely linked to this is the fact that repentance produces virtuous characteristics.
B. Virtuous characteristics
Notice what Paul says in verse 11. He says that the Corinthians’ grief produced earnestness, zeal, fear, indignation, and punishment.
These are all part of that new lifestyle that is part and parcel with repentance. The Corinthians had boasted about the evils in their midst, but they changed all that. They were filled with the fear of God. They sought diligently to deal with the matter. They became zealous for righteousness.
These are the characteristics that accompany true repentance. It is important to point out that repentance is not a laissez-faire activity. The emotion of sadness is replaced with godly emotion of energy and earnest.
Repentance isn’t done regretfully. You can change your lifestyle, but do so regrettingly. You can end up saying, “Oh, okay. I won’t do it anymore.” But you’re heart isn’t in it. There’s no real virtue in that—at least not in God’s eyes.
Real repentance produces isn’t just about new obedience, it is about the new attitude and virtues that accompany that obedience.
There is one more thing ot mention. True repentance will not only produces salvation and new virtues, it produces vindication.
C. A vindication
Look at verse 11 again. The very last part says, “At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter.”
Now, the Corinthians were not innocent in the matter. They were very much guilty. But their having sought to correct it ended up making them look like they were innocent. Because they had amended their lives they cleared themselves of the wrong.
This is also important to note. When you demonstrate true repentance, you are vindicated. Your name is cleared. You are put back in a right relationship with God and with man.
We often think that if we sweep it under the rug, cover it up with lies, push the blame on someone else—in other words, do everything in our power to avoid taking the blame and owning up to our wrong, then we can somehow make things right and come out squeaky clean.
That is entirely wrong. God says that the remedy for our problems is found in repentance. the only way to truly rectify our life with others and, most especially, with God himself, is by owning up to what we did wrong and seeking to make proper restitution.
If I might summarize what I've said here, I would do it by simply saying that this salvation that is afforded, the virtues that are produced, and the vindication that is experienced may all be summed up in two words: comfort and joy. The delights of eternal life and felicity are bestowed from heaven when we repent. God honors those who heed his call to repentance and He does not hold back any benefit that is here promised.
May that then be an impetus to you to do that which is here commanded. If the wayward Corinthians could experience such divine blessings, you can rest assured that God in Christ will pour them forth upon you.
So you have comfort and joy, and yet you have great sorrow all mixed together. It is a cauldron of emotions being all mixed together here.
And I wonder if Paul is trying to do something. I wonder if Paul’s Hebrew roots are seeping forth here. For there is an interesting thing in the OT language. The Hebrew word nacham is a word that has basically three meanings. It can mean comfort, regret, or repent.
In the life of God’s people sorrow and comfort/joy are not necessarily extreme opposites. They are next door neighbors. They may even be said to live in the same house—they are that much intertwined. I don’t know if I want to make too much of this, but this word play is interesting.
If I could draw this: Comfort and sorrow go together. Godly sorrow is a means to true comfort. Or maybe I can say that if you really want comfort in life—it will not be found in anything temporal, like a nice sofa or a higher tax bracket. Certainly such things can make you more comfortable, but true comfort—the kind that puts your heart at ease, that is something that can only be experience of godly sorrow—the kind that accompanies repentance.
The comforting grace of real repentance.
I. Its starting point [8]
Look at verse 8 with me. I want you to see where this comfort and repentance really begins. I want you to notice that it most often commences with painful words.
Notice what Paul says in verse 8, “For even if I made you grieve with my letter, I do not regret it—though I did regret it, for I see that that letter grieved you, though only for a while.”
Paul acknowledges what every person who has ever had to bear bad news has ever experienced. The words he spoke were painful—to the Corinthians and to himself. Paul says, “I know these words hurt you. And it hurt me to have to write them. I regretted doing it.” The word there is the word sorrow. It grieved him. It pained him to have to address them and be the bearer of the admonition.
Let’s face it. It isn’t easy having to speak to people about their sins. Who really likes confrontation? Nobody! But it has to happen. If the sinner is going to repent and come into this state of comfort, they have to hear it.
And Paul says though he did regret it—though he was grieved, he ended up not regretting it. In other words, his addressing them about their deviance made him feel better. There was comfort in executing his conscience. He got this off his chest and felt good about having done what he was supposed to do.
All of this is a reminder that each of us is not only called to repentance, but an integral part of the process of repentance. The repentance of our kids and grand-kids, it really depends on us. The church’s fidelity rests very much on the elder’s of this church doing their duty as shepherds.
This is why preaching can be one of the most difficult things to do. This is why so many preachers today are not doing it right. It is because preaching is bringing to people’s attention the fact that God forbids certain things and requires them to live a certain way.
Again, we like to avoid this. It is awkward. It is hard. I once was working with a young lady when I worked downtown and we got to talking. She started talking about her boyfriend and we chatted a while about their relationship. And there came a point where I had to speak to her about how it was wrong for them to be living together. Let me tell you, there is nothing easy about having a conversation with a co-worker about what goes on in their bedroom. And she looked at me and said, “That conversation got awkward.” I told her that it is my job to have awkward conversations.
I don’t know what ever came of that relationship. I don’t know if the couple ever ended up repenting or not. There were some sorrowful sentiments, but I don’t know if there was true repentance. Which is the next point that our text makes. But again, it is important to see that, in most cases, it all begins with a difficult conversation. People need to be confronted with the demands of God’s law and understand that God requires that they obey Him. If we avoid it we are doing people a great disservice because it means they are not going to get right with God and experience the true comfort that only His pardon can afford.
And that brings us then to the next point. One of the things that Paul brings out in this passage is the true definition of repentance. We see that repentance begins with a hard conversation, but wherein does it consist.
This passage is great because it shows us what true repentance looks like and it distinguishes it from false repentance.
II. Its definition
But here in this passage we see it described as three things: a true sorrow for sin, a hatred of it, and a change of lifestyle.
A. Repentance involves sorrow for sin
You’ll notice that the word grief or sorrow (depending on which version you are using) appears a number of times in this passage. The word is lupe and it carries the idea of deep sadness. It is not just the recognition that you have done something wrong. Many people know that they violate God's commands and have no feeling of regret. Many people even joke about such things and have no glint of sorrow.
Those who are truly repentant have heavy hearts. They feel the sting of conviction because they realize they have disobeyed God's command and have offended him.
But you'll notice that repentance is not merely being sad. It is important to recognize that true repentance also involves hatred for sin.
B. Repentance involves hatred for sin
Look at verse 7. Notice the word that is used there. It is a little stronger. My version translates it as "mourning." It is the Greek word hordurmos. It has the sense of being greatly distressed to the point of verbal cries—wailing. It is the idea excessive grieving or being utterly maddened by what has happened.
One of the old Greek poets had a book wherein he had 4 women walking in a line. It was something of a parade of grief. The first woman was named Lupe, and she had her head bowed upon her breast. Behind her were two women Odunee and Hordurmos. Odunee was seen tearing her hair and Hordurmos was described as a revolting, emaciated figure. She is presented as utterly disgusting- a picture of the disgust that fills one's soul. The last woman in tow was Despondancy—she represented utter despair.
Now notice that there is not utter despair here in Paul’s language. Paul talks about how their greif was only for a time. In other words, they recovered and found new joy again once their repentance took affect.
But we should note that they were really and truly cut up. They came to be really convicted about their misdeeds.
Finally, you'll notice that repentance culminates in a change of life.
C. Repentance involves a change in lifestyle
It wasn’t just grief, but (as verse 10 says) it was a grief that lead to repentance. The word repentance means change of mind. It signifies that there was a definite reversing, not just of one’s attitude and affection, but of one’s whole course of action.
And this is why Paul says that their repentance was a godly grief—one that leads to salvation; and not a worldly grief which produces death. Godly grief is the full flower of repentance, whereas worldly grief stops short and does not blossom into the real change that God demands.
Now I want to pause here and flesh this difference out a little more. I find that Thomas Watson dissects this very well and helps us to gain a sense of how true repentance is defined—how it differs from false repentance.
[1] Natural softness and tenderness of spirit. Some have a tender affection, arising from their constitution, whereby they are apt to weep and relent when they see any object of pity. These are not repenting tears: for many weep to see another's misery, who cannot weep at their own sin.
Tender conscience. Sensitive to wrongdoing.
[2] Legal terrors. A man who has lived in a course of sin, at last is made sensible; he sees hell ready to devour him, and is filled with anguish and horror; but after a while the tempest of conscience is blown over, and he is quiet. He then concludes he is a true penitent, because he has felt some bitterness in sin, but this is not repentance. Judas had some trouble of mind. If anguish and trouble were sufficient for repentance, then the damned would be most penitent, for they are most in anguish of mind. There may be trouble of mind where there is no grieving for the offence against God.
[3] A slight superficial sorrow. When God's hand lies heavy upon a man, as when he is sick or lame, he may vent a sigh or tear, and say, 'Lord, have mercy;' yet this is not true repentance. Ahab did more than all this. 'He rent his clothes, and fasted, and lay in sackcloth, and went softly.' I Kings 21:27. His clothes were rent, but not his heart. The eye may be watery, and the heart flinty. An apricot may be soft without, but it has a hard stone within.
[4] God motions rising in the heart. Every good motion is not repentance. Some think if they have motions in their hearts to break off their sins, and become religious, it is repentance. As the devil may stir up bad motions in the godly, so the Spirit of God may stir up good motions in the wicked. Herod had many good thoughts and inclinations stirred up in him by John Baptist's preaching, yet he did not truly repent, for he still lived in incest.
[5] Vows and resolutions. What vows and solemn protestations do some make in their sickness, that if God should recover them they will be new men, but afterwards they are as bad as ever! 'Thou saidst, I will not transgress;' here was a resolution: but for all this, she ran after her idols. 'Under every green tree thou wanderest, playing the harlot.' Jer 2:20.
[6] Leaving off some gross sin. (1) A man may leave off some sins, and keep others. Herod reformed many things that were amiss, but kept his Herodias. (2) An old sin may be left to entertain a new one. A man may leave off riot and prodigality, and turn covetous; which is merely to exchange one sin for another.
Why do I take the time to go thorugh all this? It is so that you can determine whether or not you have truly repented. It very well may be that you need to repent of your repentance. You might have thought that you have done what God requires—you may have thought that you have repented, but it has only a superficial form of repentance. It has been a worldly repentance, which is only a bad replica of what is truly required.
God requires that you not just feel bad, but that you cease from your sin. That you turn from it and begin to endeavor to live for God.
The true definition of repentance consists of regret and reformation. Anything less than that is deficient in God’s eyes.
What are the fruits of repentance? We’ve talked about where comfort and repentance starts. We’ve seen what it consists of. Let’s talk about where it ends.
III. Its evidences
I want you to notice that a God honoring repentance produces at least three things. The first is perhaps the most important. It is salvation.
A. Salvation
Verse 10 tells us that godly grief produces repentance that leads to salvation, whereas worldly grief leads only to death.
If there is one thing that this passage should impress upon us it is that eternal life is in the balance. There must be a break with sin. You cannot indulge the flesh and remain in the same sinful patterns and receive eternal life.
This does not mean perfection, to be sure. But there is a break with the lifestyle—a definite turning away that occurs and an endeavoring to live as God requires.
What Paul says here is what Christ himself said, “Without repentance there is no forgiveness of sin.”
If you want to receive God’s pardon, then you must turn to God.
Closely linked to this is the fact that repentance produces virtuous characteristics.
B. Virtuous characteristics
Notice what Paul says in verse 11. He says that the Corinthians’ grief produced earnestness, zeal, fear, indignation, and punishment.
These are all part of that new lifestyle that is part and parcel with repentance. The Corinthians had boasted about the evils in their midst, but they changed all that. They were filled with the fear of God. They sought diligently to deal with the matter. They became zealous for righteousness.
These are the characteristics that accompany true repentance. It is important to point out that repentance is not a laissez-faire activity. The emotion of sadness is replaced with godly emotion of energy and earnest.
Repentance isn’t done regretfully. You can change your lifestyle, but do so regrettingly. You can end up saying, “Oh, okay. I won’t do it anymore.” But you’re heart isn’t in it. There’s no real virtue in that—at least not in God’s eyes.
Real repentance produces isn’t just about new obedience, it is about the new attitude and virtues that accompany that obedience.
There is one more thing ot mention. True repentance will not only produces salvation and new virtues, it produces vindication.
C. A vindication
Look at verse 11 again. The very last part says, “At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter.”
Now, the Corinthians were not innocent in the matter. They were very much guilty. But their having sought to correct it ended up making them look like they were innocent. Because they had amended their lives they cleared themselves of the wrong.
This is also important to note. When you demonstrate true repentance, you are vindicated. Your name is cleared. You are put back in a right relationship with God and with man.
We often think that if we sweep it under the rug, cover it up with lies, push the blame on someone else—in other words, do everything in our power to avoid taking the blame and owning up to our wrong, then we can somehow make things right and come out squeaky clean.
That is entirely wrong. God says that the remedy for our problems is found in repentance. the only way to truly rectify our life with others and, most especially, with God himself, is by owning up to what we did wrong and seeking to make proper restitution.
If I might summarize what I've said here, I would do it by simply saying that this salvation that is afforded, the virtues that are produced, and the vindication that is experienced may all be summed up in two words: comfort and joy. The delights of eternal life and felicity are bestowed from heaven when we repent. God honors those who heed his call to repentance and He does not hold back any benefit that is here promised.
May that then be an impetus to you to do that which is here commanded. If the wayward Corinthians could experience such divine blessings, you can rest assured that God in Christ will pour them forth upon you.